I am often asked how we came to be missionaries and how I felt when I found out that was the direction the Lord was leading my husband.
Chris and I began our marriage in an ideal way by the world’s perspective. Chris already had a great job, had bought us a house, and a nice car. After three years of marriage and two sweet children our life was a picture of the american dream. From the outside everything was perfect.
The problem was that our lives were completely consumed with pleasing self. We faithfully attended church, but rarely gave a thought to God or what He might want for our life. We told ourselves that we could live for God and live the way that we wanted at the same time. Our days were filled with working for more money, more things, more fun, more self satisfaction. The more we gained the more dissatisfied and empty we felt.
I can remember coming home one night after church considering Heaven. I knew that I was saved and would one day be there. When I considered standing before my Lord and Savior I felt very sad. My heart was broken by the thought of facing the one who had given everything for me and telling Him that I had done nothing for Him with my life.
That night I began to pray that the Lord would turn things around in my life and in my family. I prayed that the Lord would change my husband’s heart as well. I never told Chris what I was feeling or how I was praying. I really didn’t even know how to put it into words. So I just asked God to work in his heart.
A couple weeks after this night, Chris called me on the way home from work. My normally tough, unemotional husband was in tears. He told me that he was tired of living for self and that we had to drastically change our lives. I knew that God had answered my prayer! That evening we wept and prayed together for the first time in a very long time. We didn’t know what the future would hold, but we felt such a great peace in knowing that our lives were now in God’s hands and not in our own.
This is what began the amazing journey that has led us to plant churches in London. Deputation often feels long. Sometimes I feel tired and my attitude is not what it should be. In these times I remember what my life was before and I determine to live for the Lord all over again. I can tell you honestly that the joy and peace of living my life for the Lord is so much better than the emptiness and dissatisfaction of living for myself. God meets every need and is so good to my family! Trusting God with your life doesn’t mean you have to be a missionary, but it does mean being willing to do anything God would lead you to do.
Matthew 6:24 says “No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.”
There is no middle ground. We either serve God or we serve self. A life given to the LORD is so much sweeter!
Trusting in Him,