An honest confession…

I want you to put yourself in this story. Your friend/coworker/family member is going in for her 3 year free of breast cancer check up. Everyone is congratulating her on Facebook for her 3 years of beating cancer. But a few days later the news comes, the check up didn’t go as hoped. The cancer is back and spreading fast. You’re devastated. Not just because her cancer is back, but because your friend is lost. You know that if the cancer were to take her life, she would die without Christ. Your heart aches for her and her family. You pray for the opportunity to witness to her. You see an opportunity to take her family a meal, but it turns out the day you are going she will be gone to a doctors appointment. So your write her a note, put a tract from your church inside, and plan to drop the meal off. Only when you get there you see she’s there. Her body fading quickly, her spirit fading even faster. She talks to you, she’s scared and has no hope. You try to share verses of scripture with her the best you can, but today she is angry. She doesn’t understand why she is going through this, and quite frankly, you can’t give her an answer either. You leave broken hearted, and burdened.

A little time passes, you’re busy with your own life. You keep up with her during the time and try to encourage her.  A few weeks later she’s in the hospital, she’s asking for you to come visit. You stop by, and try to share scripture and the Love of Christ, but again she’s angry, she’s hurting and she’s confused. You leave again praying something you said you will touch her heart.

Good news. She seems to be getting better, she wants you to come by for good news! You celebrate with her, you try to tell her that God has a plan for her life. But she doesn’t understand how this works into that plan.

You get busy, a few weeks pass. You realize you need to go visit your friend. But you’re leaving to go out of town. You try to get up there before you head out, but theres so much going on you don’t make it. While out of town you here that your friend has taken a turn for the worst. You pray and ask the Lord to touch her body, to at least give you one more chance to talk to her. But the next day you get the news, she has passed away.. The amount of hurt, anger, sadness, and guilt is unexplainable. You know, unless someone else witnessed to her, your friend has just passes on into eternity without knowing Jesus Christ as her savior.

I wish that I could tell you I just made this story up to get a point across. But unfortunately this story is mine. I look back at the times that I put other things in front of going and visiting her. Other times I could have witnessed to her. I can’t help but think I wasted the opportunity my Savior gave me to make an impact on this family.

I went back and forth whether to share this story with you all or not. Probably because of pride. But I pray that someone who reads this will realize they are wasting an opportunity to win someone to Christ, and realize the urgency that we as Christians ought to have. Let’s be honest- we pass hundreds of people daily who’s lives we could impact for Christ, but until it hits close to home, and someone we care about passes away into eternity, do we fully realize the job our Savior has given to us.

“And all things are of God, who hath reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation;” 2 Cor 5:18 

“And of some have compassion, making a difference: And others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire; hating even the garment spotted by the flesh.” Jude 1:22-23

With Love,


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  • 4 thoughts on “An honest confession…

    1. God bless you, unfortunately it is happening all over the world, It is not your fault, you can’t make someone respond to Gods word if they don’t want to hear it, I have so many family members like that you just want to scream, you talk till your blue tn the face, you try so hard to reach them, be the best example you can be, your kind and loving to them, I would be told I am glad you are happy and love God but I don’t want to hear it, They just don’t care, no matter what you say, it is just not enough. I still pray for them and ask God to please send someone their way that they may accept Jesus as their personal Savior, It is hard and I am so sorry it happened to you, you did your best and God knows that. Any way I am no one to be telling you anything, I am sure you know more than me. I will keep you in my prayers and may God bless you and your family as you go to Peru, may he provide your every need.

    2. This was so heart-breaking to read, and yet so very real. Thank you for shring your heart.
      People need Christ and yet many times they don’t want Him. This year more than ever God is showing me that I can share the Truth but I cannot save them. May we share like it is the only time they may hear, and allow Christ to give us love for lost souls. May we realise the great need in every life around us and learn to see like Christ.
      Thank you again for this. This moved me.

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