In our church and circle of missionaries who have trained under our pastor, we have this little triangle logo we refer to as “Be. Do. Serve. Train.” This logo is simply a pictoral representation of the biblical teaching and the philosophy we use to disciple others and train our future missionaries.
It’s very simple to follow. In a nutshell, the “Be” level is who I am that no one else sees, not even my husband. My “Do” level is how I live my life. “Serve” is how I live for others. “Train” is what I do to help others grow in leadership.Simple enough, right? Well. . .
I get it wrong SO many times.
I get so focused on that “Do” and “Serve” level that many times I don’t take care of my “Be” level. I get so busy (or think I do) with taking care of my husband, taking care of my kids, helping take care of missionaries, helping at the church, helping the ladies, helping the students, cleaning my house (or trying to!), doing the grocery shopping, whatever, you name it, that I forget to take care of the most important part of my life–my own personal relationship with Christ.
I take care to work on those other levels, well, to be bluntly honest, because those levels are what other people see in me. No one sees who I am way down deep inside. Not even my husband. No one else knows what thoughts run through my head. Only God. And it’s super easy, even in ministry, to sideline Him. It’s super easy while serving, to forget all about the One whom you serve.
God would much rather I serve Him by working to cultivate my relationship with Him over giving Him the lipservice that I so often give. He would much rather I set some things aside to seek Him than to busy myself with doing things for Him.
I sat in a very sobering class on Friday listening to a man plead with each of us to be who we say we are in ministry and to not live double lives.
Living a double life doesn’t just happen overnight; it is cultivated by not growing a personal relationship with Christ. It is formed through millions of little decisions to sideline the Lord from our hearts. It is evidenced through lipservice instead of heart service.
I don’t want a live a double life. I want to be who I say I am. I can’t do that unless I am working–making conscious choices to work–on the issues of my heart that no one else can see. And, if I may say one other thing, I can’t even do the work. It’s a work of grace that Christ must do in me. And I definitely can’t get that work of grace by leaving Him out of that most basic level of my life!
If there is one thing I would like to encourage you in, it would be to make daily decisions that would lead to growing your relationship with Christ. I’m pretty sure that if I struggle with making time to spend not just reading God’s Word but also allowing Him to work on the hidden things of my heart, others do to. Make the decision today to allow Him to do that work!