Do you still think he would have asked?

It was June of 1999, and I was just 19 years old. I watched a handsome 23 year old guy ask me to let him see my sapphire ring that I always wore. As he held it and then dropped it, I watch in shock as my best friend somehow ended up on one knee – not with my sapphire ring in his hand; but instead, a beautiful diamond engagement ring. He asked me to marry him, to be his wife, and to spend the rest of my life with him. I had no hesitation. I had no reserve. I had no doubt that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with this guy. I answered my most favorite question of all with a happy “YES!”
Last week I was feeling pretty bad. I couldn’t really get out of the bed and take care of all the things I typically do. I watched my awesome husband work so hard at taking care of our 5 kids: dropping them off, picking them up, arranging meals and even fixing pony tails. I thought to myself, as my love for my husband grew, “This is not what he signed up for.” Mark didn’t mind the sacrifice last week. He did it both out of love for me and because he’s just an awesome guy. Watching it all unfold really made me think a lot about couples that we have met; and even some we have counseled with, where we left them thinking  “Do you still think he would have asked?”

Do you still think he would have asked if:

He knew the girl that swooned over him would later doubt every decision he made, and question his authority as the God-given leader of their home?

Do you still think he would have asked if:

The country he yearned to serve the Lord in, the country that during teen summer camp they prayed side by side for at the altar, she would now declare she hated?

Do you still think he would have asked if:

His high school sweetheart that proudly got up to get him a drink at her parents house-the girl that dressed in white and vowed to be his helpmate- would now demand him to be a grocery shopper, a honey-do list completer, and a personal nanny at her service?

Do you still think he would have asked if:

The girl who said she would live anywhere with him, even in a shack  now only complains about how she is provided for?

Do you still think he would have asked if:

Her Facebook feed that was once filled with pictures of him and status updates that bragged on him were now just about the kids, the parents, and the friends?

Do you still think he would have asked if:

His sweetheart who once admired him and smothered him in compliments now only belittled him and was overbearing?

Do you still think he would have asked if:

The girl that testified she loved God with all her heart now had no room for Him to be Lord because her children and even her husband are her idols?

Do you still think he would have asked if:

The Bible college freshmen who worked the long bus route just to catch his eye, now had no time for ministry and complained when he spends extra time serving others?

Do you still think he would have asked if:

The quiet girl that spoke kindly to all now only yells, complains and gossips?

Do you still think he would have asked if:

The one that use to steal kisses, and dreams of sharing a bed and making a family; now just gives a cold shoulder, no goodnight kiss and excuses?

Do you still think he would have asked if:

The smitten teen who use to spend hours preparing herself for their date nights, now only dresses up for others?

 

The day I said YES, I have never regretted. I love my husband.  I love our family.  I love our life.  As a wife, I pray that my husband can say the same.  I pray that I am never the wife that will cause my husband to wish he would have never asked.

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  • 7 thoughts on “Do you still think he would have asked?

    1. Beautifully written and should inspire other wives to examine themselves in this light and I pray they’re not found lacking.

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