Ever have those “Wait! That didn’t sound the way it did in my head!“, or “How did that come across so different than I intended?” moments? So do I! They say some have a way with words and there’s many times I know I don’t.
Communication can be hard. We intend to communicate something to our spouse, but our lack or excess of words often just don’t do it justice. There may be things you wish your husband knew as your learn to better communicate with him.
I’m asking the Lord to bless you dear wives who try so hard. To encourage you to keep on keeping on and to treasure that man that you serve God and share life with!
Here’s a few things I think our husbands want to know:
I admire you so much more than my words-at times- may say.
Admire: “to regard with wonder, pleasure and approval” I couldn’t have said it better myself! I’m not a dictionary, but I do wonder at the man you are! Your humility. Your grace. Your integrity. Your quest for purity and faithfulness to me and our family. But above all else your faithfulness to the Lord. You war on the front lines and I know your burden, soldier, because I tend to those wounds too. You always get back up and keep serving! What a man you are! A modest man, who wants no glory but believes his Savior is due it all. That, my husband, gets more than my approval. That get’s my utter devotion! A loyalty that, though a bit fierce at times, gives me great pleasure. I may not always say it just right, but it sure burns, deep down in my tender loving heart!
You do not have to earn my love
You are the other half of our oneness, and that’s enough. I love you not for the degrees you’ve earned, how much you’ve accomplished in the ministry, how far up the ladder of “success” you’ve climbed or how “comfortable” you can make my life. I’m just a simple gal who simply loves you because you are mine. You love me when I wonder how anyone could. You hold me, lead me, father our children and make me laugh. You do life with me. When our guests are gone and our children are in bed or out of home, it’s just us. I choose to love you just for you!
I do not expect perfection
You love me with all of my shortcomings and inabilities, and I want to do the same for you!
Sometimes I say things, share some hurts or ask for changes, but that never means I want you to be perfect. Truth is, I don’t think I’d enjoy being married to a perfect man at all! What a burden it would be to have to measure up! But seeing you grow in the Lord as His Word ministers to your heart and brings about marvelous change…now that’s something I enjoy! As we struggle uphill through life, we learn from each other, help each other and grow closer to each other as we do with the Lord. It makes for a pretty fun ride back down!
My “ugly” is not always a true representation of my heart
I really want for the Lord to sift through the dirt to get to the gold. Thank you for not giving up on me when the dirt seems like, well, nothing but dirt. Thank you for believing that there’s gold even when it’s buried far away under the weight of the moment as misery starts knocking at the door. Remember that as you fight on the front lines, I am right behind you. I may not suffer every wound, but I feel every blow. I’m learning to be strong, but at times, I’m not. My “ugly” may manifests itself in various ways (like neediness, worry, withdrawal and let’s be honest, the dreaded tears!) Thank you for your patience and support. I depend on your affirmation, appreciation and encouragement. It helps me serve you and the Lord so much better, and that dear husband is what matters to me.
I’m learning- I am a work in progress
I’m learning new truths on my marriage journey everyday. Like, happiness is fleeting but joy in the Lord is real! Giving is fulfilling. No matter how accessible and justified the temporary relief of self pity and self-centeredness may seem, its long-term side effects are debilitating. I’m learning that God looks on the heart and honors the upright. That blessings, in many instances, are not measured by success and “happiness”, but by the peace that graces our hearts and the grace that strengthens our spirits. How the truth in God’s Word is the very remedy for every problem we encounter and is the very sift that brings forth the gold, a treasure with eternal value…..the kind that really matters. Thank you for being by my side through every step of my “purification” and sticking out my ugly to ensure God brings out my gold!
I am truly thankful for you.
I am here for you.
I am committed to our marriage. I am committed to the Lord and that is why I am committed to you and why dear husband I will follow you to the ends of the earth or wherever He may send us.
From my heart to yours,