Last year, I conducted a survey of some ministry wives that I know. The question I asked them was, “How do you help your husband behind the scenes so that he can do his job well as a pastor, missionary, church staff, church laymen, or church planter?” Here are the top 10 answers that I received.
- I do EVERYTHING for the kids before church. Dress, change, feed, answer questions. They do not go to him for anything and I do not ask him for anything so that he can be free to gather his thoughts and pray before a service.
- I help my family eat well and take care of themselves. My husband likes me to have a menu of healthy meals and to cook as often as I can instead of eating out. We also exercise together. I make a plan for us to follow when we exercise.
- I pray for him in his ministry.
- I don’t make unrealistic expectations of him. I do all that I can myself around the house so that he can spend as much time as he can in his studies.
- I put him first (after God of course). He knows that even if I have a thousand things to do, he can call me up needing something, and I will stop whatever I am doing to help him out.
- On Sundays, I try to make sure that I do not tell him things that he doesn’t “need” to hear. Like the kids are fighting over something, or this person isn’t going to be able to do this that or the other. His focus needs to be on what the Lord has given him to preach to the people and he doesn’t need to hear nit picky things before he preaches.
- I try to keep the house clean and clothes done. He shouldn’t have to worry if he has clean underwear or a shirt for Sunday. It should be taken care of. House should be clean because I know he likes a clean house….and who knows who he might be bringing over unexpectedly!
- I try to get the normal every day stuff done. Taking kids to school, doctor appointments, answering annoying phone calls or text messages, picking kids up, going to the dry cleaners, getting groceries. You know the things that he does not need to worry about and so he has the time to study and minister to others.
- I try to keep my emotions out of his ministry. When something goes totally wrong, or someone does something that reflects poorly on my husband, I CAN’T give into a negative attitude about that person.
- I encourage him. Men can be sensitive sometimes and might need to be reminded that they are AWESOME! Sometimes he needs to hear from me, “You are my hero, and no one does that ministry better than you do.”
I just want to give all you ministry wives out there a huge “Good Job!” You are a great wife. You are doing an awesome job. Keep up the good work. I know you’re not doing it for the thank you’s or the pats on the back. You are doing it for Jesus. And He is worth it all.